The Infamous Bullpen

Imagine your first day at your first job. The ideal state of affairs as etched in my mind would be meeting some administrative person at the reception, a tour of the campus and the most important aspect is being escorted to the dream office with your own desk, a comfy chair, a phone with a landline allotted to you and last but not the least enough cabinet space for your files/folders etc. Well, let’s be pragmatic; don’t let your imaginations run wild yet.

After all the extraneous, insignificant details were enforced and the information overload got on to me, I was ushered to “The Bullpen – my office”. My first reaction was “come again, are you saying that I will work in this bullpen everyday? You must be kidding me” I couldn’t be less sure of the fact that this would just be a temporary office space and shortly, a nice, big office/cubicle will be arranged for me; and then I could see the wonderful glass frame of my dream office break into a million pieces right there, right then.

Before I tread this path a little more, let me define the bullpen :-). The bullpen is like a hotel, in the literal sense. It is a big, square office area with provision for 8 random people to work-in or hardly work-in to be precise, on a first-come-first-serve basis. This means no assigned desk, chair, cabinets, desktop and/or phone. All I got was a laptop, which still keeps me company all day, irrespective of where I get to sit. As if this wasn’t enough distress, the kind of people I have to put up with everyday is what makes it even more intriguing.

1st category: No cell phone daytime minutes! People that fall under the first category are usually under the impression that they own the bullpen, with earsplitting and extended conversations being their forte. The only pacifying other-half of this coin is that atleast these people talk work. I still wonder how I meet my deadlines!

2nd category: No work!!
The second category of people in the bullpen have absolutely no work at their disposal, so they end up making personal calls and discussing anything from personal problems, credit card issues, dinner plans, sports, boasting about their children, about last evening’s experience or any random topic at their will depending on whether it is a male or a female, young or old. Is it easier to close your ears or shut your mouth?

3rd category: Absolute Don’t Care Attitude!!!
This is the worst kind; these people sit right next to you and munch on some junk all day long. May be their wives don’t feed them dinner or vice versa. Imagine constantly being subject to burps, farts, sneeze….yikes! And they also try to compete with the first category on how long and loud they can converse over the phone! Now this instigates the birth of the fourth kind!

4th category: At the mercy of the above 3 categories!!!!
This is where poor souls like me and couple others come into the picture. One excuse and we run as far away from the bullpen as possible, whether it is a one hour lunch break or 3 half hour coffee breaks and if the situation gets worse and/or unbearable, we work from home :-). And time spent in the bullpen is effectively distributed between work and IM!

But all thanks to the bullpen, there is always something to do :-)

Now you guys know the reason for my “busy” status on gtalk ;-)